Who am I as a communicator?

For this assignment I had my husband and my best friend, Maria complete the communication assessments. The biggest surprise for me was that my husband, Tim, scored me a 65 on verbal aggressiveness. Maria scored me at 40 and I scored myself at 58. I  think the reason for this is that Tim sees me at my worst. This brought up some conversation about some things that I did not realize that I do and say when we have an argument.  Maria and I only get together 1-2 times a month, and it is usually a happy time with a ton of laughter. It would be interesting to see how a co-worker would evaluate me, something I might try another day.
Another interesting insight was that all three had my listening style as people oriented.  All three of us scored me at a 35 for this one.  I am hoping that means I have good listening skills.

Communicating Differently

I am currently a stay at home mom, and when I first read the instructions for this assignment, my thoughts were, I don't communicate with anyone outside of the family, how in the world am I going to complete this assignment. As I went through the week I started to pay attention to every interaction that I had, from the cashier at the grocery store, church events, and the community center that I volunteer at.
I found myself communicating in slightly different ways in each of these settings through the culture of all are very similar.  At the grocery store, the conversation is the same, no matter the race or age of the person. It's hi, did you find everything, have a nice day, etc.  I thought of doing an experiment of giving a not typical answer just to see what happens, but then I had the flu and did not get to go on my third trip of the week. 
Due to the flu, I also missed going to church Wed. night, and I did not volunteer on Thurs. at the community center.  I thought back to my interacts at those places.  At church, I am on my best behavior and trying to teach of anywhere between 8-20 preschoolers.  My communication reflects that.
At the community center, I identify more with the people coming in for assistance than I do the people I volunteer with. I know what it is like to be in their shoes and my communication reflects that.  I think here is the place that I use the communication skills that we have been talking about the most.  The Platinum Rule works well here along with compassion, kindness, and empathy.

Communication on TV

 I have had several friends tell me that I need to watch The Crown on Netflix so I used this as an opportunity to do just that.  Before I started watching it,  all  I knew was that this was the story of how Queen Elizabeth came to power. 
I was very confused at first watching it without sound and knowing very little about the show. It started out with Phillip being knighted and then kissing Elizabeth. As I watched it, her body language looked like she did not want to be kissed. At their wedding, she appeared to not want to marry him which made me google if she had an arranged marriage.  She was very stiff, looked down, and back at her father multiple times. I thought she was going to run at one point.   After I watched it with the sound I found out that she did want to marry him, but no one approved of their marriage.  I am guessing that is what lead to the stiff awkward body movements.
Through out the show the King keeps spiting up blood and I could tell that he was going to die. He had surgery, and talked with the Dr. and he cried. I was right about this part, but I was wrong because I thought that he had told Philip as they were duck hunting that he was dying, but he did not. He hinted at it by telling Philip he needs to give up his career to take care of "her." 
I found it odd that Princess Elizabeth is often referred to as "her" through out the show.  I think I may have to continue to watch it to see why.
I think if I had did this with a show that I watch such as, "This is Us," I probably would have done a better job at guessing what was going on.  This is because I know the characters, how they generally handle things and I know the plot.  All of this information makes guessing at what is being communicated easier. 

Reference
Morgan, Peter. (writer), & Daldry, S. (director). (2016). Wolferton Splash. [Netflix series Episode].In Daldry, S. (Producer). The Crown. United Kingdom: Netflix.

Communication Skills

My husband is Senior Lead Quality Assurance. Basically, he leads a team that tests software before he goes on the market.   He works from home a few days a week and has frequent conference calls during these days.  I often listen as he can take a call that is utter chaos as people are blaming each other for the reason why a product does not work and turn the conversation into something productive with everyone taking a part to get the project done. I often ask him "how do you do that?"  His response is "you just have to know how to get each person to do what you want them to do and be happy about it."  I think that is not easy, I can't do that.  I would love to be able to lead a team the way that he can as far as getting people to listen and do what needs to be done.  He doesn't raise his voice, he just says we have a problem and how are we going to fix it.  He hears everyone's ideas and the team states which one is best or often a combination of answers. People then volunteer to take different parts and work on it. 
I want to model some of my communication like him. He knows each person on his team, what they are good at, and what words to use to motivate them.   He gives each person time to talk and the team as a whole makes the decision and he guides it to the answer he wants without them realizing it.  Each person feels valued and important which is what makes him a great team leader.

Professional Hopes and Goals

My vision is to open a high quality child care where children and families from all abilities, socio-economic group, race, religion, and any background can come and know that their child is being well taken care of by a quality staff who will not only work on academic with their child but all aspects of development. This is greatly lacking in my small community. As a mother of a child with ADHD and one with autism my kids have been kicked out of varies center all because the staff does not know what to do with them nor are they willing to learn.
I hope that with the center that I will open that parents and staff from diverse background will work together to provide the best possible care for all the children in our community. I want to show our community what can be accomplished when we all work together and do not settle for mediocre.
I would like to see the entire early childhood community come together and work on how train and support staff and families related to issues of diversity, equity, and social justice.  I would also like to see a curriculum made to help staff with how to teach these issue to young children. 
Thank you to all my colleagues for continue to challenge, and grow my worldview. I wish you all the best of luck and hope to work with you all again. I know that we will help to shape and change the field one child/family at a time.


                 

Welcoming families from around the world

I just found out that in two weeks I will be getting a new child in my class from Andorra.  Where in the world is Andorra?  I start doing research so that I can make this child and his family feel welcome. First I look up Andorra on the Department of State website. I find out that it is a tiny country between France and Spain in the Pyrenees Mountains. I find out it is a popular tourist destination due to duty-free shopping and variety of winter sports.  I then do a google search to learn about the culture and costumes of the land.
From the world factbook, I learn that Catalan is the official language though many speak French, Portuguese, and Castillian. The dominant religion is Roman Catholic. This is still just superficial facts, I need more info on what the culture is like. I do an image search to see what the culture is like. The scenery is breathtaking. I print off some of the pictures to make a book to talk to the class about before our new friend arrives. We look up how to say hello in Catalan and practice saying it.  I looked up youtube videos about the culture and life and showed appropriate ones to the class. We also researched the food of the area and talked with the cook about adding some to our menu.
I hope that this preparation will help me make the family feel welcomed and that we are here to partner with them in their child's education. 

The Personal Side of Bias, Prejudice, and Oppression

My friend Kelly is white and she has six wonderful biracial children.  One day about seven years ago we meet up for lunch. She had two of her children with her who look more like their father than her. We were eating and laughing as one of her children was doing different impressions of famous people. An older man came over and I guess thought that Kelly and I were a couple. He said, "it's a shame that you two are living in sin, but to bring kids into this is a shame, besides they should be with their own kind."  We sat there in shock and then I busted out laughing, at no point did we act like a couple or anything. However, the kids sat there with their heads down, no longer smiling or laughing like earlier. Kelly sent them to the car, and she told me that being told they should be with their own kind is something that they deal with often. I did not know what to do or say.

I felt so sorry for the kids to have to deal with ignorance from adults, I feel angry for adults treating any child this way and heartbroken for Kelly as she does not know what to do or say to help her children cope.